Is love a science? On Valentine’s Day intersect emotions that give reasons for psychologists not remain indifferent to date, because the burden of this day may well lead someone to the office, the result of “conflict”. That conflicts are these? Already there we go.
1.Estimulação
On Valentine’s Day, there is a “subtle stimulation” that does not ignore the day. After Christmas, the trade gains breath with the arrival of Valentine’s Day. The simple box of chocolates to jewelery, dinner after a dream weekend, everything is served in advertising. There is a “trading day”, says psychologist Nuno Augusto to talk to the TVI24 , explaining that it’s like going to the movies and, although we have no desire to eat popcorn, see it, smell it, hear leads us to feel the need to eat the appetizer.
2.Ansiedade
Nuno Augusto said that the day can produce an “anxiety” or those who are in a relationship, or for those who do not estão.Para those who have a companion, manage Valentine’s day can be difficult. “I do not know what to do” to please the other, in line with expectations. “Fear of failure” can make this day one “risk factor” “stress,” according to the psychologist. Even monetary issues can be an enhancer element of “anxiety” by failing to make ends meet.
3.Egoísmo
A 2002 study, published in a newspaper on behavior consumers, authored by Robert Rugimbana and other entitled “the importance of gifts of Valentine in relations”, concluded that “most young men think that taking a Valentine’s gift is a must.” On the other hand, “25% assumed that expected something in return for non-material nature, with a sexual connotation.”
4.Altruísmo
Women care more to Valentine’s Day than men, is the conclusion reached by Shirley Matile Ogletree, the University of Texas. The investigator did 95 interviews with young people, with an average age of 23 years, 52 women and 43 men. They like to get gifts, but also feel very happy to give gifts.
5.Diálogo
The psychologist makes a reservation, the importance of burden of this day also depends on the “dynamics of each couple.” The “dialogue” between the partners can even leave the conclusion not want to celebrate the day, not connecting to date, and it does not mean that the relationship is in crisis.
In cases in crisis the day Valentines can, in turn, be seen as a last resort to save the marriage or dating and win a synonym for “ignition” for the relationship to work. In the background, as the psychologist, “there is no manual” and each couple is a couple.
6.Conflito
Two University of Arizona researchers studied the effect of festive dates relations, including the “catalyst of Valentine’s day.” Valentine’s Day can be seen as an “instigator of the deterioration of relations” in couples who already have problems. If the expectations of a partner are low or if there are other putative partners show desirable, then the effort to carry out a valentine with everything the script commands may seem too. “The psychological and monetary costs of organizing a meeting of Valentines do not justify the benefit” and in this case, rather than celebrate the relationship, the conclusion is that it is best to end it, qualify Katherine A. Morse and Steven L . Neuberg.
7.Depressão
as there is no manual to live valentine’s day, there is also no manual on how to deal with cases of people suffering from the day of boyfriends because they do not have a partner.
Be because the relationship ended or because they never found the other half, there are dates that resemble it, requiring a balance. The day can act as a “catalyst” of repressed emotions. Generally, in these cases, it helps to realize “what led to the end of the relationship.” For “bachelors” gradually get them to “work the trust”, the “assertiveness” may be the way to those who do not feel happy alone, reverse the situation. The recipe is not always the same, because the “life story” counts a lot, vinca Nuno Augusto.
8.Solidão
Opposites attract each other, the saying goes. For Valentine’s Day, it was created the day of singles. Party to tell the world that you are well alone or make up for the loneliness?
Last year in China, the country of single thanks to the one-child policy, the Alibaba website, online sales, created a kind of “black friday”, a day of discounts, and consumerism shot. The middle of the day had been spent over EUR 8,000 million, equivalent to almost 5% of Portuguese GDP, according to Reuters.
9.Afetividade
Another reading to do valentine’s day or singles is make them a “reminder that human beings are rational and is well in the community,” notes the doctor. “we need to be in relationship with others. Human beings work better with others as a team. ” After all, we descended from “primates and they lived in the community.” The psychologist realizes:. “The confrontation with each other [a view] positive, creative, constructive, has won”
10.Felicidade
The Order of Psychologists counseling “cultivate every day a healthy romantic relationship” as “praise, thank and apologize” and “accept differences and not expect the other to perform all of our expectations and desires.”
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